Chapter 7: The Pride of Rokka
“Hey, hey, give it back! I have to go, I promised!”
I failed. I was happy about the message from Toudou and couldn’t help smiling as I looked at it.
Rin snatched my smartphone from me.
It’s not just the smartphone, the male students are having fun taking my bag too.
A group of them is standing in front of me, blocking my way. Even if I try to take the smartphone back from Rin, they interfere.
“Heeey, you’re going for cafe without telling us, huh? Lucky you! Oh, we’re going to karaoke too, of course you’ll come with us, right Rokka-chan?”
“Oh, karaoke sounds fun.”
“I’ll make a reservation.”
“Anyway, you can just break your promise with Toudou, it’s fine.”
How many minutes have we been going back and forth like this? I have to get on the train soon or I’ll be late for the promised time. I don’t want to cause Toudou any trouble. My heart is weighed down by something heavy.
Everyone is amused to see me anxious. It’s so ugly. It’s like I’m looking at myself.
What’s so funny? Why do they enjoy doing things that others dislike? Hmm, I understand. They’re on that side because they don’t want to be in my position.
–But Toudou is waiting, and I’ll make him feel bad again.
My irritation manifests in my words.
“Rin! You used to be a kinder person, didn’t you!”
Irritation is clearly visible on Rin’s face. And at the same time, a look of fear.
“Huh? Rokka-chan, do you know your place? You’re at the bottom of the class. You should be grateful that we’re teasing you. Oh, but you’re too stupid to understand, right?”
“Haha! Michiba is dumb, after all.”
“Anyway, let’s go already.”
“The reservation is all set, and Michiba is included too, so don’t worry.”
“Hey, we’re not going overboard or anything. We just really want to go to karaoke with Michiba.”
I bite my lip. Why can’t they understand? I have to hold back the urge to throw a fit. If I do that, they’ll start bullying me seriously from tomorrow. That…I don’t want that anymore.
I was looking down, feeling frustrated, but then I looked up at the sky.
…No, that’s not it.
–Breaking my promise with Toudou is even more unpleasant.
The smartphone doesn’t matter at all.
I remember the name of the cafe. I don’t go to Shinjuku much, but I’ll be fine even without a smartphone. I don’t need my wallet. I won’t have tea. Anyway, I still can’t be on good terms with Toudou.
Probably everyone is already at the cafe. So I just have to get to the cafe, and tell them that I have something to do and can’t have tea with them.
Having a clear purpose strengthens my heart. My strengthened heart gives me the power.
“Hey, where are you going? We’ve made a reservation for you too at the karaoke place~. Are you breaking the promise?”
“Promise? That wasn’t a real promise.”
“Heeeh, then you can go, but you know…be careful from tomorrow, Rokka-chan.”
Bullying happens at school every day. The bullies just find it funny. The bullied ones just wait for it to end.
It’s a terrible thing that breaks the heart.
Even so, I pushed away Rin’s hand.
The fear in Rin’s eyes grows deeper.
“Wha-what’s wrong with you…? Aren’t Rokka and I [friends]? You’ve betrayed Toudou before, so it’s fine, right? You don’t even feel guilty, do you?”
Rin was like a mirror reflecting myself.
“That’s not true at all! I don’t want to break the promise! –Is that really what it means to be [friends]? I–I’ll never–“
“Huh?! Why are you getting so serious?! It’s-it’s just a joke, we’re not actually bullying you or anything!”
I shook off Rin and started running at full speed.
“From tomorrow on, it doesn’t matter if you are bullied. What is most important is this moment right now.”
“Haa, haa… Haa, haa, Toudou, I’m sorry…”
The legs just wouldn’t move forward. I kept running through Yotsuya-sanchome and between the large buildings. It’s hard to breathe. My throat is in pain.
My body is crying out, and I feel like I’m about to cry, even though I don’t want to. Even though no one is watching, I can’t seem to cry –
I wipe my face with my uniform sleeve.
This is no time to cry. I have to get to the cafe as soon as possible now.
“Ah”
READ THE ORIGINAL TRANSLATION AT gadgetizedpanda.net
When I saw the Shinjuku-sanchome sign, I tripped on the step and fell. My body hit the asphalt.
My whole body hurts. I try to ignore the pain, but my legs are trembling.
My knees are scraped and bleeding. Blood is coming from the hand I tried to break my fall with.
I heard a flustered voice from behind.
“Are you okay? The wounds are shallow. Can you stand up? I’m not sure, but try your best.”
“Y-yes, thank you. I’m in a hurry so…”
A stranger with long hair tried to help me up. I just thanked him and started running again. It doesn’t hurt. It doesn’t hurt. But my heart is aching. I hate myself for breaking the promise.
“Haa haa… It doesn’t hurt… I’m fine, I’m almost at Giyoen, just a little more to Shinjuku… The south exit is further…”
With every step forward, my body cries out. The physical pain is tearing my heart apart.
Still, still –
I’m very late. Running is Sasami’s specialty, isn’t it? I wonder how Sasami’s doing? Is she practicing hard? If I tell her about the cafe date with Toudou, will she get mad? Maybe I should have invited Sasami too?
The pain makes it hard to think clearly.
I’m already walking at the same speed as before. But I can still move my legs forward. So I can’t give up. I have to apologize to everyone. What should I say? How should I apologize? I don’t have my phone, will that make them think it’s strange?
I’m lacking oxygen in my head. People passing by are looking at me strangely.
What came to mind then were the days I spent in the library with Toudou. I enjoyed teasing the clumsy Toudou. I relied on Toudou, who taught me studying. I liked watching Toudou’s amusing lack of common sense. The side of Toudou that only I knew. I had basked in my sense of superiority –
“Uu, uuu… Uuu…”
I can’t cry. I promised I wouldn’t cry anymore –
But the guilt and regret of breaking the promise again well up from my chest –
Even though it was evening, the surroundings had become dark.
I try to forcefully move my body, which is about to give up. My feet suddenly stop. My tangled legs get caught in each other and I sink to the ground. I wasn’t even going at a dangerous speed anymore. I hit my unmoving legs repeatedly.
“Why won’t they move… I have to stand up. I have to apologize… Ah, ah–“
When I tried to get up, I felt dizzy and my head went blank.
I can feel my body falling forward, but my body won’t listen to me.
I can’t give up yet. I have to get to Toudou –
Instead of falling onto the hard concrete, I’m caught in a warm embrace. Someone has caught me.
I cling to that person’s body, mustering all my strength.
“Th-thank you… I have to go… Everyone…”
“That’s not necessary. Hmm, as I expected. However, the injury was unexpected. Bruises, scrapes, and anemia…”
“Wh-why are you here?”
I’m confused. The cafe is quite far from here. There’s no reason for Toudou to be here. But why are they here?
Hanazono and Tanaka also came from behind Toudou.
“Haa haa, I’m so glad I found you! I was so worried!”
“Phew, I can relax now. Tsuyoshi, you figured out where the Michiba was. But this is no time to be saying that, should we go to the hospital?”
///
continue
///
The emotions I had been desperately holding back are about to overflow. I suppress the urge to cling to Toudou’s body.
“I-I’m fine. Hanazono, you’re overreacting. It’s just a little scrape. See, I can stand up now.”
I absolutely can’t cry. I use all the strength in my body to get up. I face Toudou… I’ve been so scared the whole time. Thinking about what I’ve done to Toudou… But I have to face Toudou properly.
The words I wanted to say just came out smoothly.
“I’m sorry I’m late again. I’m an idiot and lost my phone and bag. I wanted to tell you that I couldn’t go to the cafe you invited me to, that’s why… I wanted to say that, I wanted to…”
If I had my phone, I could have contacted them immediately. If I had my bag, I could have taken the train. If I hadn’t had my phone stolen by Rin, if I hadn’t been mean to Toudou. It’s all because of my own choices.
So it’s all because I’m an idiot.
I swallowed the words I was about to say – that it would be better if you didn’t have anything to do with me. That’s not something I should say. Toudou said it would be lonely not to be involved. I know a cold answer won’t come. I’m just showing my weakness to get the words I need, it’s just self-indulgence.
I put strength into the one inside my stomach. I turn my brightest smile towards Toudou.
“I won’t trouble Toudou teacher any more. Come and have fun with everyone. I’ll be happy if you invite me again next time.”
Toudou’s eyes seemed to have grown a little bigger. He has such beautiful eyes.
I’m already making you confused and lost, but you don’t need to worry about me anymore. Toudou would probably say [Is that so? Then it can’t be helped] in that case. Hehe, my acting smile has become genuine.
“No, I don’t want to leave Michiba where her heart is wounded. I can’t express it well, but Michiba is accepting my selfishness. Is it because of the malice towards me in the past, the guilt of causing trouble, or the meanness of the classmates? I can’t judge which one. But it doesn’t matter. Let’s sit down and take care of the injury, then go to a cafe in Shinjuku 3-chome that I know.”
It was a shock, as if I was hit on the head. Unexpected words.
“Huh? Wh-why…?”
“If you’ve reset Michiba, then you can start a new relationship from scratch.”
“–!”
The vow was broken.
Something that overflowed from the depths of my heart turned into tears. –I was quietly crying.
He was too sweet. I just wanted to change. Even if you try hard, people don’t change. The only time I could be my true self was when I spent time with Toudou in the library.
I didn’t need the act. I didn’t need the bravado. … I should have gone back to those days when I was happy to see others smiling.
“–Umm. I can’t beat the teacher…. …Hic, can I… hic… have a little time?”
The tears won’t stop, but I have to cry now. Ahaha, you are truly my teacher………..
–The tears I shed reset my heart.
Also check out my friend Localizermeerkat for more LN translations!
BUY THE SOURCE MATERIAL TO SUPPORT THE AUTHOR !!!
Kindly click on the green button above and contribute to filling the green bar if you’re interested in having another LN from the request page translated. Also, every donation is being used to purchase the source material and to fund more English translations.
Please consider joining my Ko-Fi membership. By becoming a member, you’ll also gain access to 2-10 additional chapters of all of the novels from this site translated into English. Last but not least your support will also assist me in upholding the translation quality and speed. For more information, please follow the link.
Donation for faster release is always welcome
Additionally, I am now accepting translation requests.
